2008 in Review
How often are we offered the chance to explore a new social mileau?
My biggest regret involves a memory from public high school. While sitting in drama class, I found a note had been dropped into my bag, to the effect of: "We, the [cool and weird name that I can't remember]s, are a group of interesting misfits. We sense that you might be like us, and invite you to join our group. If you choose to accept it, meet us at the blah during the blah."
I took it to my parents and asked them if this is that "bad crowd" I keep hearing about. They said it was likely to get me in trouble.
Problem was, unlike most high school kids who think they're individualists, loners, and rebels, I actually was one. I utterly disdained my peers. All of them. I was unclear on what a prep or a jock or a goth or a band geek was until recently. I didn't even know the name of the only kid in high school who I talked to. Turned out later he was named Matt too.
So I ignored the invitation note and didn't look back until my late twenties, when I noticed I had skipped that phase of life in which one takes risks and seizes a cornucopia of opportunity.
Today, there is nothing I love more than introducing people to the world I inhabit. I also want a taste of theirs. I know what I like and what I don't like, so I'm already pretty sure I'm not missing much, but I want to confirm it by being alternately bored and confused on anthropological expeditions. Saturday evening I almost went to one of those parties that hand out fliers and charge you ten bucks to get in. One of these days I'm going to do that. In the meantime here are some firsts for 2008, involving wine, women and song.
1. I became measurably intoxicated.
Early this year I finally found out what it's like to be intoxicated with alcoholic beverages. I had two glasses of red wine in a row. Without being insensitive to actual palsy sufferers, "buzzed" felt like what I imagine palsy to feel like. I began by attempting, with intense concentration, to detect pleasure, and failed. Second, I drank several large tumblers of tap water to prevent hangover. Third, I spiraled downward into gloom and near-panic over how clumsy and slow I had become at typing, drawing, walking, or remembering facts, such as which chapter* in Luke contains the words of Jesus that if someone takes your coat, give him your cloak also, which Christian musicians violate when they attempt to prevent piracy with digital rights management. Fourth, I hid to avoid saying things like that to people.
The worst part was not trusting my thoughts. I understand those who don't want to be medicated. It was like the paranoid identity crisis of a Philip K Dick character. Even my ridiculous over-reaction might just be the alcohol doing my thinking for me. And what it was thinking was that there were alcohol molecules, in my cerebellum, for hours!
2. I got out on the dance floor.
A few months ago, had the urge to go to City Club and hit the dance floor. She asked me to dance with her, and I did. Check. At first I worked very hard to accurately imitate her dance steps, or moves, or grooves. Then I looked at the moves some of the others were making, but you're not supposed to care about what other people think, right? Just your dance partner. Then I noticed the laser device that projects loops on the walls is actually projecting some kind of lettering. Did you know that? On the surface of the projector, it's backwards and very small. What is it saying? I couldn't make it out. Then I thought about blogging what it's like to dance. Then the dance stopped. So here is what it's like to dance: is sexy. I got tired after a while. I still don't get it.
3. I was overtly hit on by an attractive woman.
My relationships typically start from within the friends zone, including and especially that with . However, as of a couple of weeks ago, I was overtly approached by a stranger (nobody you know) for dating purposes. Awesome. I will refer to her as A. This is the one I mentioned who is both Christian and polyamorous. I was very curious about how that intersects. Apparently, it doesn't, but the collision can be ignored as one of those impractical things about one's faith. OK. There might be more detail, but I'm afraid to ask, because among people of faith, giving a damn about the consistency of their doctrine is often confused for getting on their case about it.
Too bad A is anti-choice and votes accordingly. That is the context for the new userpic I posted in the last entry. If you deny a woman's right to control her reproductive destiny, I deny you your choice to involve our reproductive organs with each other. Despite the fact that I can't cause pregnancy, I only fornicate with pro-choicers. At those orgies, you know? The ones where we pass around snack bowls of dried embryos. They taste like Rice Krispies.
But no matter. Unlike drinking and dancing, the pleasures of flirtation are unmistakable to me. It is its own reward, and does not need to aim for a relationship goal. One of the very interesting things I learned from A is her description of the various social divisions that sometimes run along musical lines. Not being into the right music can be "social suicide" with a particular crowd. This explains why dating sites ask about musical tastes. Good to know! Already A has been a good friend to me, and I'm glad we met.
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Comments
chirex on (None)
matt-arnold on Dec. 30, 2008 12:36 AM
I never thought of that!
amanda_lodden on Dec. 29, 2008 3:22 PM
the pleasures of flirtation are unmistakable to me. It is its own reward, and does not need to aim for a relationship goal
Good to know.
rachelann1977 on Dec. 29, 2008 3:38 PM
Despite the fact that I can't cause pregnancy, I only fornicate with pro-choicers. At those orgies, you know? The ones where we pass around snack bowls of dried embryos. They taste like Rice Krispies.
Ya know, it's stuff like this that makes me glad to have you as a friend. But I'm just weird that way.
sarahmichigan on Dec. 30, 2008 3:19 AM
If it's the same Christian polyamorous "A" who has a profile on OKC that I'm thinking of, she seems to be making her way around my friends list...
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