My First Drama Post. Ignore It.
I flirted too hard. I am feeling bad for being insensitive and oblivious. I need to get it through my thick head that when I hear "polyamory" this not Clintonspeak for "lots of unimportant relationships that one can take it or leave it." In poly there is a desire for commitment, and deep emotional importance.
I guess I can't feel so bad though... reading back over the logs and thinking back on the face-to-face, I communicated my refusal to commit, and that I don't believe in true love, and the circumstances of what's going on, over and over and she just didn't hear it and still read more into it.
Rachel is the only one who can see this post.
Comments
cosette-valjean on Jan. 14, 2005 8:45 PM
My darling,
I feel sad for this whole situation. That poor girl. Love is blind as they say. I wonder what she felt as she read my e-mail detailing how I'm not into polyamory at all. I thought it interesting how she said she would feel betrayed if her husband got emotionally involved and left her instead of just having sex with some random woman. Surely she wanted more from you than that by how hurt she is. How does she go about removing emotional attachment from her sex with those people other than her husband? Surely if you have a sexual relationship with someone for long enough the emotional attachment develops whether you want it to or not.
matt-arnold on Jan. 14, 2005 8:59 PM
She doesn't remove the emotion, in fact sex is secondary to it. If I were not an insensitive clod I would have given myself a refresher course on the definition of polyamory and saved a lot of tears. Their point is to fall deeply in love with a new person and include her or him in the family of her and her primary for life. Not to have "a twinkie on the side" for sexual pleasure.
I have given my OKcupid profile the revisions to it which were long neglected because I thought I would never get a bite to it. "In a relationship which allows flirting, just looking for friends with cuddle benefits" etc.
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