My banishment
Yesterday my account was temporarily disabled on PCCboard, the unauthorized message forum of my alma mater, where the alumni discuss (among other things) an underground resistance to the college. There was certainly no ill intent on my part, but I feel bad about what I did and the consequences. I agree with the moderators' need to make an example of my thoughtlessness. You can read the story in .
I miss the old board, The Student Voice. It was based from the secret subversive student newsletter; the paper and e-mail version of which has since been crushed by the administration's expellment pogroms and forbidding the internet on campus. But I feel partly responsible for the downfall of the web version which was available to alumni.
Comments
treebones on Jun. 9, 2004 7:15 AM — The part I find interesting...
...is something buried in the background in your pccboarders post.
I need to check and see whether I need to tune up my sarcasm sensors. (:
Were you actually unaware of the fact that one of the primary reasons women occasionally ask for private forums is because of acculturation and experience issues which make them reluctant to speak their minds with relative freedom in a mixed gender forum? I'm not going to be irritated, whichever answer you give. But I *am* curious.
matt-arnold on Jun. 9, 2004 7:51 AM — Re: The part I find interesting...
Your picture of me is incomplete until you realize I experience occasional fits of being a well-meaning but insensitive boor. :) Especially with gender differences, of which I have to deliberately remind myself from time to time. You have been described by mutual friends as feminist. I never even met any feminists until I started getting involved with fen. I've always had to evolve and grow my consciousness with very little help. My sister's friend described me on the board as one of those talented intellectuals who possesses not even a grain of common sense. I get her point. Thinking uncommon thoughts means picking buffet-style the collected human wisdom as if it is necessary to start from scratch. This severs a smart person from the collection of safe reflex reactions from which the masses of dumb people operate. As I walk away from a sheltered and severely introverted life, all I have to walk towards is an image of the world. My social expectations of other people are formed not by experience, but by this image. I'm confident in my views of science and theology, and my core values, goals and place in the universe. But my views on how best to engineer relationships with carbon-based bipeds are thrashing about with no guidance to cling to externally or internally. My policy is to just go with what seems best until it breaks.
treebones on Jun. 12, 2004 6:12 AM — Re: The part I find interesting...
Oh, I understand using an experiential/experimental method of human-interaction-model building. I'm living my version of the process. There are several people in fandom who know me from my early college years, and thus have seen me gradually change from a socially feral Christian fundamentalist to whatever it is I am now. There've been a lot of bouts of cluelessness on the way, and a fair amount of tripping over hidden social hazards.
Of course, I've come to the conclusion that *most* of the people I like and respect are just making it up as they go along, which has made me calmer about the whole thing. (:
Am I a feminist? It's not part of my self-identification. And it seems to me that the definition keep changing, and there are bits of the definitions that I definitely do *not* agree with. I could well be, but it would depend on who you asked. (:
drkelso on Jun. 9, 2004 8:29 AM
How can you be partially responsible because the site admin was a talentless hack that couldn't figure out how to set up a simple website.
matt-arnold on Jun. 9, 2004 8:38 AM
Talent is not an issue where there exists sufficient motivation to either get it done or find someone who can do it. The admin was de-motivated. He just didn't want to deal with all the controversy any more.
drkelso on Jun. 11, 2004 9:27 AM
Yeah, probably so, but I like to think of him as purely lazy at the least. He'd probably be best suited to just take the site down and give the url to someone else who cares. I bet you would have fun with it.
matt-arnold on Jun. 11, 2004 9:39 AM
I wish he would. Although I'd need a lot of tech help, I'm a good moderator.
drkelso on Jun. 14, 2004 5:03 AM
its still dead...you really messed up this time. :)
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